Debate rages in the art world today after the curator of the Louvre arrived at work this morning and noticed some subtle but significant changes in the museum’s most prized possession. Monsieur Pierre-Jacques Inclement told our reporter…
“It has been less than 24 hours since I last beheld the work in question and I am certain that it did not previously portray a pink cartoon pony! In addition, there is a carelessness in the brush strokes that is not characteristic of the great Lenny. It is my opinion that some time last night some unknown person broke into the Louvre and replaced the Mona Lisa with this cunning but, to the expert eye, suspect reproduction.”
Theodore Babble, a professor of Post-Pre-Post-Structuralist Cultural Studies at Harvard’s School of Postmodernist Sophistry begged to differ, claiming that…
“Of course this is the real Mona Lisa! Any art historian will tell you that the average Renaissance woman bore a striking resemblance to a horse, rather like Celine Dion but without the unbelievably atrocious dancing. No, I am certain that this is the genuine article.”
Famed UK art critic Alasdair Higgenbottom had this to say…
“Not having inspected the work in question I can’t say for certain, but as I recall, La Gioconda did not have as sunny a disposition as the woman depicted in this painting. Nor to my knowledge did she have pink hair, pink hair being an aesthetic innovation bestowed upon the human race only much later. No, this is definitely a fake and should be given to New York’s Museum of Modern Art, perhaps in exchange for all those soup cans printed by that albino jackass whose name I won’t even deign to mention — with any luck the French will throw Albino Boy’s prints into the Seine.”
Ouch!
Less vitriolic in expressing his views was writer and cultural critic Hank “The Gopher” Grosvenor , who stated that…
“Even if the work in question is a fake – and I’m not saying that it is –  it is nonetheless an improvement on the original. Not only is it much brighter and cheerier, but we no longer have to wonder why the woman depicted is smiling – it is obvious, she is smiling because the painter has just offered her a plate full of cupcakes.”
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